Birthson Birthday

Mirror, Mirror  by rcw

Happy Birthday Mark!
Back in the ’70s I was not permitted to even acknowledge that I had a child, let alone that he had a birthday.

Of course, that was back when it was still considered a “bad” thing to have a child out of wedlock.  It was amazing to me to watch how people scrambled about to keep this aspect of nature hidden from society.

God forbid anyone’s girlchild get “caught” showing an inflated belly and a motherly glow!

Well that was then!  These days, all kinds of women are getting pregnant without even having sex!  They select the genetic make-up, go to an appointment for an implant and there ya go!

Isn’t it amazing how things change?

In truth, I never kept my birthmotherhood a secret…other than not talking about it with family members and my parents’ neighbors, after all they went through so much trouble to conceal everything.  And considering the era, how they themselves were raised and the type of neighborhood we lived in, they weren’t capable of making any other decision.  I’ve learned to accept it without bitterness…although it did take a few years. Somewhere inside, I knew we’d meet.  I prayed we’d have some sort of ongoing communication….I lived in hope no matter what people said….and believe me, they said a lot! But my true friends believed, like me, that someday we’d meet.

It was really amazing when Mark found me….out of the blue one morning I got a life-changing and faith-fulfilling phone call.  Suddenly everybody in the family knew there was an extra grandchild in the world, but even more important….I knew that Mark was okay and had a fairly good life. 

I’d have loved to have given him a childhood with me, but was and am pleased with how things turned out. In a sense, giving him up for adoption assured he had what he needed most; a family.  At the time, I didn’t know what I’d have been able to offer him…so figured a good start was the best I could do.

So at 2:30 a.m., December 10th 1973 my birthson was born. I called him David Christopher meaning  “Beloved, Bearing Christ.” I had no fantasies about his adoptive parents keeping his name, mind you.

I named him for my heart’s sake, and hoped that one day I’d be able to tell him how much I love him.

So for today, Fifty Five Is The New Birthson Birthday….because it really did happen and I’m so very blessed to have him in my life again.

Thanks Mark, for looking for your birthfather and me….I love you beyond words.

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